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Relationship with Self

(#10 in the Series about Divine Relationship)




All Relationship is about your relationship with Self; with your willingness to be intimate with Self - your personality Self, Soul Self, Christ Self, God Presence Self (group soul/monad self), Angelic Self, ET Self…, and the All That Is Self. How intimate will you be, how close will you get? Your outer reality is a reflection of your innner reality. How intimate your lovers/partners and to a lesser degree, your friends and family, will allow themselves to get with you, is the amount you allow yourself to be intimate with yourself; to the magnificence you are; to be the divinity you are; to be the surrendered compassionate, forgiving, impassioned avatar that you truly are.

All relationship with anyone or anything is with the Self, with the One; the wholeness of "separation" within the wholeness of All That Is - with the One Self. The other person in your life who is the relationship of the moment is not another person. You are relating to the same self as yourself. There is only one Self. The other is a mirror Self, the same Self that is all mirrors.

Your judgements, desires, expectations, attachments, resistance's… are only those aspects of yourself that are apparently unloved, still separate, or perceive themselves to be separate, unlovable, unworthy, bad, evil… All of these negative things you see in another person, if they are judged, are some aspect of yourself that is self judged; condemned by self; by itself, which is a separate self, a part of the ego world of separation, the world of separate selves, where things that people do and ways people act are different to us.

Whoever you give to, you are giving to Self. It is the idea that you are giving to someone outside of yourself that creates co-dependence; that is an illusionary relationship which creates a situation whereby you are spending yourself; depleting yourself; trying to give, but really to get, to receive some attention energy, or gratification, or love.

This is the goody goody syndrome, the rescuer who is helping victims, who "need their help"; someone who operates from victimhood. Everyone is a sovereign entity, no one needs our help, for we are all divine. Support and realization of our oneness is supportive and helpful, and on spiritual levels we need no human help, only the experience. We need divine human help or synergetic support (communion). Give unconditinally, because it is natural to do so, because you are giving to Self.

Who ever you take from, you are taking from your Self. If you are taking from others conditionally, it is because your consciousness is in separation, in lack, conditional love, rather than unconditional love. You are trying to fill the hole in you, the bottomless pit of separation.

The Twin Flame Fantasy

There is only relationship with the One, the Self; all else is fantasy, an illusion. This is the essence of distorted romance, a fixation upon an object, a self outside of self, that will complete your self. The fantasy is finding that perfect mate that will fill that whole of separation, balance your masculine or feminine, complete you, create oneness for you, help you back to God… This manifested in marriage, and the search for the perfect partner, and many romantic lifetimes, myths and stories. The new fantasy, is the twin flame fantasy.

Now I'm not saying that twin flames do not exist, for in fact they do, and they are the closest person to ourselves as anyone, but even the manifestation of your twin flame will not complete you. You are already complete and you are not separate from your twin flame, certainly not on higher dimensional levels, and ultimately you are not separate from anyone else.

The Self is complete, even without your Twin Flame, you are still complete. Only the ego has attachment to some idea of completion by obtaining the ultimate prize, the twin flame, which will allegedly complete you by bringing your God or Goddess Presence back to you, as if you lost this somehow, misplaced perhaps, but not lost. You are complete. You are the God and Goddess! Do not be deluded by your physical sex, or by your attractions to the same sex or opposite sex. Many of these attractions are a desire to retrieve those aspects that you feel you have lost. This is chasing the God or the Goddess. I have chased the Goddess all my life, chasing after something that would "make me complete". But I have reached the end of the journey and by Divine Grace, the Divine Mother has helped me realize that - "I Am the Goddess!

Previously I had considered and to a large degree realized that I am All That Is, and this gets more and more real as I grow and awaken further. And I realize that I am the son/daughter, the offspring of the God/Goddess union. And I am the teacher and the student and…. But I had not really considered my self to be The Goddess. You would have thought that I would have since I knew I was All That Is, and the Goddess/Divine Mother is part of All That Is, but obviously there was resistance in my consciousness to consider it, aspects that felt disconnected from the Goddess aspect of creation, separate and removed from the Divine Mother, the Holy Spirit; the inner world of Shekinah. My quest as a Knight was to find this Goddess, but she was no where to be found because she was within all along.

Regardless of your gender orientation or sexual orientation, you may be chasing the God or the Goddess, or both, to heal those parts of yourself that feel cut off from the Father/Mother aspects of Self, of All That Is. We are also now remembering, rebalancing, recollecting, realizing that we are also the Christ, the Son, the Daughter, the offspring of God/Goddess, Father/Mother. As a species ascending, we are creating the Christs that we all are, by the combination of the Father/Mother; Father Sky (Cosmic), and Mother Earth. On planetary levels, on grounded levels, our realization of our true divinity is related to our connection with these forces of creation, to father sky, (air, water, rain - the sperm, falling to earth fertilizing the seed of earth, enlightening our bodies, the dense matter, creating light body, the Christ/Christess Body.

Attention Energy

Attention is not intimacy, attention is not love, it is just attention. Because of our wounds of separation and perception of ourselves being separate from each other, and disconnection from love, that the love that is everywhere and within us, because we are disconnected from the realization that we are love itself, we act from lack, from deals and agreements with others in order to receive energy and love. Because of this lack consciousness, this feeling of unworthiness, we manipulate and control others and ourselves to give and get love and energy. To the degree that we are connected to divine self, and to true intimacy, to our own ability to be intimate with self and others, will be the degree that we play this game, this control drama.

This conditional love/energy stealing that we do, with our agreements to give if we are receiving, is detailed brilliantly in the "Celestine Prophecy". This is why this book was so well read, and is still so important today, because it reveals the essence of what we do as humans on planet earth because of our disconnection with love.

Attention energy is part of this scenario. It is a well intentioned pattern of relationship, whereby you give all of your attention to the person you are in relationship with. It is a co-dependent energy, one that is designed to imply to that person that you love them, and their the one for you. You will think that it is love, that it is passion, but it is just attention, it is just longing, a desire for connection, oneness, or re-connection with your divine masculine or feminine, with source.

If you do not receive attention in return, you will suffer to more or lesser degrees depending on how much you have invested in the relationship, or how much attachment you have to being fulfilled/completed by their love/attention.

Plain and simply, if you think that this conditional give and take of energy is love, than you have intimacy barriers, and it is time to heal your wounds and reassess your perception of reality and relationship. When this attention energy pattern was revealed to me, or I revealed it to myself, I was blown away by my level of denial, by how much of what I thought was love was complete bullshit. As a quantumly awoken sensitive new age master, I thought I was quite surrendered and open to great intimacy in relationship and in myself, but luckily I/we manifested for me a relationship that would reveal to me my denials. Luckily a divine master graciously acted out (mirrored) my resistances to intimacy by not giving me the attention ("love") that I passionately wanted and thought I deserved. Her similar resistances to intimacy would not play the game right so that I could get what I wanted, her attention energy was elsewhere.

Eventually I revealed to myself my folly which was all part of my next initiation of intimacy, relationship and life, and moved full speed on to my next step of being a sovereign entity - God/Goddess/Christ, a co-creative force of love/light.


The key to everything is surrender. The key to your enlightenment, ascension, connection to earth, connection to the cosmic, ETs, Angels, Devas, Ascended Masters, the Hierarchy of Light/Love Beings… is surrender. The key these realizations and connections is surrender to intimacy, surrender to the intimacy, the oneness that exists within you and between you. To develop a relationship with anything, you must become intimate with it, you must surrender your resistance to the oneness that already exists.

In relationship, the beauty of intimacy and key to intimacy with a partner is surrender, finally letting your guard down, finally letting go of your addiction to separation, to conflict, to resistance, to attraction... This seems like a dangerous thing to do because you have been hurt before, and it seems like a dangerous place to go because of what is hidden there. Intimacy is the real initiation of life and ascension; it beings up all of your hidden repressed wounds, this is the nature of all conflicts in relationship, because intimacy exposes all of your denials, all your lies, to self, to others, to God. All the places we do not love and do not want to reveal; all the aspects of self that do not feel loved or feel they do not deserve to be loved. What is revealed is growth, change; self realization is evoked, this is the gift of relationship. And ultimately what is revealed behind all of this is our magnificence, the unchanging essence of our beingness.

There is something to be said about being alone and not pursuing intimate relationship with others so that you can be solely with yourself, which gives you time to know who you are, to know your rhythms and biases, to connect with your Soul, God/dess Presence. But this introspection can be used to deny as well. Alone in a cave, it can be easier to hide from certain aspects of self that would only be evoked in relationship with others. It is also often easier for others to see your lost bits than yourself, because of our tricky self generated denial mechanisms. It is often more difficult to hide from another master. Intimate relationship radically reveals all the denials, guards, fences, walls, mortar placements, and booby traps in your consciousness.

Relationship brings up your relationship to relationship. Relationship with one person brings up relationship with all people, with All That Is. Relationship with another person also brings up your relationship with self, and who is self. Connection and interaction with another person demands that you find out who’s who in the zoo. You are required to be who you truly are and be truthful with yourself about your needs and desires to have a peaceful relationship. You are forced to confront those aspects of yourself that do not operate from unconditional love but feel the need to manipulate, control and take energy and love to not feel pain and suffering of their wounds of separation.

In respect of yourself, as you release all that you are not, and reveal and heal those aspects that feel unloved and unworthy, as you function and act within intimate relationships, you then realize what you desire to manifest in your life, and what you deserve as a force of divine creation, as part of God/Goddess All That Is. You now require this in your life, as a statement to the universe, to the manifesting forces, to your soul…You do not project this desire on to anyone specific although, this is denial and conditional, your desires become unconditional, or universal, or a knowing of what and who you are now, and as a divine force of creation you deserve divine prosperity, the nature order of life and creation, the natural state and desire of your Soul/God Presence/All That Is.

To be in truth and function wholistically as a co-creative relationship, both people require themselves to know what their true needs and desires are from their Spirits, from their essences of Love, and release all conditional needs that are not real, that have been adopted from their wounds of separation, genetics, past lives and learned from societal programming.

Being in each others presence for extended periods of time, especially if having sex, creates higher levels of intimacy, even without much talking or exploration or emotional revelation. Just being in the presence of others creates more intimacy. Your auric, etheric, ka/astral body, emotional, mental… bodies are blending; your psychic energies are interacting, communicating, blending, connecting. Your chakras are spinning and melding together, especially from face to face intimacy, love making, hugging… Psychic cords develop, some positive (unconditionally loving), inter-dependent; some negative (conditionally "loving"), co-dependent. These ones need to be continually released and the core of their emanation must be released and healed. (Utilize the assistance of the Cosmic White Fire to melt them, and/or Archangel Michael's assistance to cut them, or gently pull them out and send them back and retrieve yours).

Intimacy is nothing other than having your heart open in every moment (or as often as possible). If it closes down for any reason, there is a pattern, fear or agreement that causes you to close it down, so time to get to work and release any limitation, pattern or wound associated with this situation and be open again. Living a co-creative unconditional life of truth and love, means your heart is always open, there is no reason to ever close it down. There is danger on planet earth, and people do try to take and attack, but you are the creator of your reality and everything you manifest in you life is for your growth and awakening to your magnificence, to show you where you are limiting yourself, to show you where you hidden wounds lie to be able to heal them. You do not need to protect your heart from breaking because it is already in pieces spread all over the cosmos. Recollect and heal your lost pieces and realize your heart encompasses the entire universe of All That Is.

Love is Fickle

Until beings heal all of their masculine and feminine wounds and realize they are love and don't need to get love to become fulfilled, they will continue pursuing relationship. On an evolutionary level, from the perspective of further embodiment of divinity and realization of self worth, beings who are progressing through the initiations of life and who are continually opening to greater and greater intimacy, will always be drawn to relationships where this high level of intimacy and truth is available; to beings where it is embodied, real, grounded and active. Beings who are open and surrendered to their divinity, where intimacy is their greatest passion and natural way of being, where denial does not exist (or at least to lesser and lesser degrees).

If love is not allowed to flow, to be expressed and allowed; if you cut yourself off from its channeling, or if your partner cuts themselves and yourself off; if the love supply is cut, a higher vibratory source will come along quickly to fill the gap and help you move on to your next step, because balance must be maintained and evolution is the natural way of creation.

If you are still open, yet your partner is not, love will come along from another source, someone who is ready for love to flow freely in their life. They will come along to snag up the channel, which is you, and will channel it to you. We will always go where the love is, if we’re smart. We will go to where the love is like a cat that is being neglected, a cat will leave a home that is absent of love and seek a more wholistic environment without looking back for a second.

Can you be this fickle, this truthful and “selfish”, manifesting and acting on what you need and deserve for your next step in your evolution to love and intimacy? Can you be surrendered and open to greater and greater intimacy in your relationships, without running from your wounds, without using others to fill your gaps, but just following your spirit and going where your next evolutionary step lies?

Be Divine Relationship! Be the Love you are now!



©ZaKaiRan AatKa'Nui SheeHan

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